Always in Control

Always in Control


Life isn’t always easy. In our everyday struggle to be on top and to have everything we want, there are some disappointments, failures, rejections and criticisms. But to some people, these negative points might trigger more than a sad face – panic and anxiety grow out from all of these.

There are several kinds of anxieties that we experience. The social anxiety deals with your relationship with people, to your family, neighbors, wife or husband, boyfriends or girlfriends, friends, co-workers and the like. Do you feel unloved by your father? Do you have a hard time talking to your teacher about your grade? Does you friend think so negatively of you that you tend to shy away from him? Do you panic whenever you are about to give a speech in front of the whole school?

The mind anxiety deals with more than a portion of the way you think towards a particular situation. When a friend doesn’t talk to you for more than a week, you already feel that he’s angry, and therefore this makes you anxious. Do you sometimes exaggerate and overreact to a particular situation? Do you sometimes read people’s minds and try to put their words in your mouth?

The body anxiety deals with how anxiety creeps in to how you look like. Am I too fat that she doesn’t want to talk to me? If only I am more muscular, then maybe she would go out on a date with me. If I were Chinese, then maybe I could go out with that Chinese boy.

Feeling anxiety talks about your low self esteem and how you feel about yourself and others. If a parent tells a child that he’s stubborn and hopeless, the child might keep that in mind and harbor those ill feelings until he grows older, which would later result in anxiety and panic.

So how do you overcome all these?

Accept yourself. Accept who you are. Accept that you can’t do everything. Accept that not everything in this world is right for you, that you make mistakes. Most important of all, just accept that you’re a human being.

It might not seem easy – it really isn’t. It takes time, conscious effort and determination to overcome all the feelings of guilt, insecurity and non-acceptance but in the end, this would help you in learning who you are.

In fact, it might even be a learning process for you since during the course of whole episodes, little by little, you learn who you are, how to respond to the world, and how people respond to you.