Are You In An Addictive Relationship

Are You In An Addictive Relationship? It Is Time to Get Out



Addictive relationships are sometimes hard to notice. Psychologists believe that one tends to get into addictive relationships if he or she grew up in a dysfunctional home. Many times one realizes that he or she is in an addictive relationship only after understanding it by going through it.


The addicted person needs the other person to fulfill all his needs. As with any other addiction, there are many issues in this type of a relationship such as control, trauma, self-worth, fear, loss of a sense of self, etc. The relationship is used as a means to attempt to resolve other deeper unidentified and unresolved problems.


In an addictive relationship one person is self-centered and extremely independent. He believes that he has the sole right to do whatever he wants to do and whenever he wants it too. His partner is dependent and other-centered. She is willing to reflect whatever her partner wants. This is how addictive relationships function.


Here are some common signs that characterize addictive relationships:


  • There is no balance in addictive relationships. One dominates the other partner. Most of the time one person is the giver and the other is the receiver


  • There is a demand for instant or immediate gratification. The dominant one expects everything to be done instantly, in the present moment. This is one of the common traits found in drug addicts and alcoholics, too


  • There is a great deal of control, obsession and fixation on the partner. There is a tendency to ‘make the partner change’ with an idea of fixing him or her


  • Dishonesty is present to a great extent in addictive relationships. Most of the time one partner tries to hide certain personal aspects, which the other should not find out. Sometimes one partner puts up false cover-ups to hide the real person


  • Emotional highs and lows are present in addictive relationships. The lows last longer and goes deeper than the highs when the emotional highs are plain ecstatic


  • Social isolation is yet another sign of addictive relationship. Nobody else – not even parents, siblings, children or close friends are allowed into their relationship. People in addictive relationships prefer to be left alone


  • There is no true love. All healthy boundaries that characterize a normal healthy marriage are absent in an addictive relationship


  • Signs of an Addictive relationship also include a cycle of pleasure, pain, cynicism, blaming and reconnection. This cycle goes on and on until one partner tries to break free since the situations get out of control.


How does one overcome a relationship addiction? Here are a few tips to help you overcome your relationship addiction:


  • Make your rescue as the number one priority in your life


  • Identify the roots of physical and emotional abuse


  • Assure yourself that you are an independent soul who is in charge of your own life


  • Detach yourself from the emotions that bind you to the relationship


  • Cultivate positivism


  • Find support groups Consider getting professional help, if need arises.


If you are in an addictive relationship it is time you get out of it and find a life of your own.